Morgan’s Rantings and Waxings

This is kind of an old favorite that most of you may have seen, but I figured it’s always time for a good Yatta. Plus, I found an English translation. Here’s the video: Original Yatta Video Flash Mock And here’s the translation, which I find incredibly entertaining: G R Double-E N Leaves G R Double-E …

Air fresheners are a classic example of the everday place of human delusion. We buy air fresheners in all kinds of exotic flavors. Then we spray our new “Strawberry Lilac” scent all over the room after an unfortunate incident. We do this so that our brain will go “Wow. I’m in a field with strawberries. …

I punched out and said my goodbyes, and thus ended Best Buy’s (or His Satanic Majesty, as I like to call it) opressive hold on my life. And yet I still felt a twinge of sadness as I said goodbye and walked out the door, making my last purchase with my employee discount, and having …

It’s always around this time of year that I wonder what the members of the bands “Cannibal Corpse,” “Slayer,” or “Iron Maiden” do for Christmas. Do you think they open their presents on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day? Who plays Santa? Do their mothers always insist on having cranberry sauce at dinner even though no …

The flourescent lights of the electronics store burn With the refrain “Silver Bells” playing It is christmas time in the city Old man winter has returned with a vengence The river nostalgia gushes through my vains Memories that have no connection Yet seeming importance Every year I pretend it will make sense Yet it passes …

It’s a depressing thing when you realize that if you were just slightly balder, you would be Art Garfunkel.

With the help of a co-worker, here’s a couple bumper sticker ideas: My other car is a genius car. I’m with stupid car.

“Conservatives are always fighting so hard for protecting the unborn. But once you’re out, you’re on your own.” – George Carlin

I’ve been absolutely addicted to the olympics in the past couple weeks, and here’s a few observations. – Could the women in the beach volleyball wear anything less? The men in beach volleyball wear baggy shorts and t-shirts, yet the women wear tight bikinis (the Germans being in bright pink ones, which absolutely perplexes me). …

Another bumper sticker observation. I saw another one with an american flag on it, only this one said “The Power of Pride.” I don’t know about you, but that kind of scares me. Proud men fall and fall hard. I know from experience.